Moving On
by jennycraig10
Summary: Its been 4 years since Jaimie died. Landon meets a girl in medical school who becomes his worst enemy to someone who touches his heart. But is he ready to move on?
1. Chapter 12 The beginning

MOVING ON  
  
Chapter 1- The Beginning  
  
It's been 4 years since Jamie died. I was beginning medical school, which practically took up all my time. Still at night I sometimes lay in bed crying wishing she was here with me. I miss her so, and it's hard to move on.  
  
I sometimes feel like she's here with me. When I have time I go to church and I feel more connected to her there.  
  
How I miss her.  
  
I love her so much.  
  
I still sometimes wonder.  
  
Why is she gone?  
  
Chapter 2- The Bugger  
  
Medical school is hard, yet I keep studying harder wanting Jamie to be proud of me, even though she's not really here. I was in class 5 minutes early, wanting to read a little more of the bible. I just started reading it and it made me think more about God. Just then came in my worst enemy Rachel Chan. " Hey bookworm. What you reading?" She then sat next to me. " Why are you sitting there?" " What? It's a free country you know." "You just want to bug me." "Wow! You are smart aren't you? So what is that book anyways?" " The bible. Have you ever read it before?" " No I haven't. I don't go to church and I'm not Christian." " Oh, so you go to temple? Are you a Buddhist?" " Nope." "Do you have a religion at all?" "Yeah. My own religion." Before I could ask her what she means class started. After class was over, Rachel was leaving in a hurry. I ran up to her and she stopped and looked at me and said, " You know Carter it's hard to read you. I thought you hated me. Now here you are chasing after me."  
  
I " I just wanted to ask you what do you mean by your own religion." "Lets walk and talk or we'll be late for class." After we walk in silence for a minute she finally explained to me. " Some people they don't believe in God. Some believe in goddesses or angels. Some people mix and match." " What do you mean?" " Some believe in God, goddesses, Buddha, and the Chinese angels. What do you call that? It doesn't have a name because it's not what all people believe in. I believe in God, the Chinese angels and Gods, and goddesses. That's not being a Buddhist or Christian is it? So I call it my own religion."  
  
We were in our seats when she finished talking. Class was supposed to start in a couple of minutes. " Look I know you might disagree. Some people they get mad because they think this is wrong or something. But its true I don't believe everything the Christian teaches or what Chinese teaches. I just believe in what I want to believe."  
  
And like that she turn to stare at the teacher that was walking in. Our conversation was over, leaving me to think. 


	2. Chapter 3 Old memories

Chapter 3- Old memories  
  
I live in an apartment near school. My dad was paying my bills even though I told him not too. He said once I get out of school I can start repaying him then. It's a nice cosy place and its really roomy and I like just sitting in the living room reading a book.  
  
Lately I wasn't getting the things I was being taught. School was driving me crazy! I didn't have time to go visit my mom, Jamie's dad, or Jamie's grave. Every night I stay up late, in my apartment drinking coffee and studying.  
  
The next day at school Dr. Stevenson, one of my teachers, announce midterms were coming up. This was very bad news. After class everyone was about to leave, Dr. Stevenson called me up to his desk.  
  
" Landon, I been observing you for these past few weeks and I notice you are having troubles."  
  
" Yes, you see I'm not quite understanding the textbook. Lately I've been staying up late trying so hard to get it."  
  
" If your not going to understand anything by the time midterm comes, I'm afraid you might fail. So I suggest you ask one of your classmates to help you. I'd prefer if you ask Rachel Chan. She seems to master this really well."  
  
" Uh. I think I'll ask someone else. Rachel and I aren't." I just left the sentence unfinished know he was smart enough to get what I mean.  
  
" Well then I ask someone who does understand all of this. And you better hurry, midterms are coming in 2 weeks." It was 8:00 p.m. at I was at my apartment sitting next to my small kitchen table. I read my textbook over and over again still not getting it. Then the conversation I had with Dr. Stevenson popped in my head.  
  
'Maybe I should call Rachel', I thought. God no she'll tease me for the rest of my life. Then another thought popped into my head, ' Beats having to fail midterms and disappoint my family. Disappoint Jamie.'  
  
The next day I went into my classroom and try to look for Rachel. There she was dressed in a long black coat with her hair down. I went up to her and saw her reading the textbook. She must have felt someone near her, because she looked up at me and said, " What do you want Carter?"  
  
" I need you help." I said so quietly in came out as a whisper.  
  
" What?" I can't hear you."  
  
" I need your help," I said more loudly.  
  
" You? You need my help? Well, I'm surprise." She said with a smirk.  
  
" So can you help me?"  
  
" Landon, you're going to have to do better than that! You should be on your knees kissing my feet."  
  
" You know what forget it, I'll go ask someone else," I said as I started to move away from her desk.  
  
" God, can't you take a joke. Fine, fine, fine I'll help you, I'll come over and tutor you tonight."  
  
" Thank you," I said as I wrote down my address down for her. Now I wonder what price do I have to pay now?  
  
After school I went back to my place preparing for the tutor session. It reminded me about the time I had to tutor a kid, because it was part of my punishment. 'Maybe I should give Rachel a hard time,' I thought. She said she'll be here at 6:00 and it was almost time.  
  
Once she arrived she made a quick check of my apartment. Nice, was all she said.  
  
So once we sat down we got sown to business. Rachel was really close to me, going over the book, that I could smell her. She'd smelled like strawberries. It started to make me feel uncomfortable having a girl in my apartment. I never had one besides my mom and some friends, and Rachel wasn't a friend. I never did date after Jamie died.  
  
Just the thought of Jamie's death took me to a whole new place. I wasn't paying attention anymore. I was in my own place reliving my memories with her. Before I knew it tears were in my eyes.  
  
" Landon what's wrong? Talk to me." Rachel looked at me with concern in her eyes.  
  
" Its nothing" I mumbled wiping my eyes.  
  
" Maybe we should take a break so you can tell me what's going on."  
  
" No, its okay."  
  
" Landon you were crying. You're not okay. Tell me." I didn't say anything for a while. She finally broke the silence, " Fine if you won't talk I will."  
  
She started to talk about her life. Telling me about her family. Telling me about her. She was an only child. Her parents always fight a lot and she hated it. When she turned 18 her mom died of alcohol. Her dad abandoned them when she was 12 and never made contact. She had a rough life. She was telling about something personal and I decided she should know.  
  
I started to tell her everything. How I was before I met Jamie. How I met her, how I felt about her. Everything. I told her where she was buried and how I hated that she died. I told her things I never told anyone before. As I talked old memories came flashing back. Before I knew it I was crying again. But I still kept talking, how Jamie changed me, how she had faith in me. . I talked about her family, our marriage, the love we had, and her death. I never talk or allowed myself to think about that. All I did before was cry at night wanting her to be there. Not how life changed without her here or how it affected everyone.  
  
I looked at Rachel; she was so interested in my story and most of all she was concerned about me. I saw a new side to her, the kind and loving side. When I was done I was now sobbing. She hugged me and slowly rocked me. When an hour passed she looked into my eyes and wiped my face with her shirt.  
  
"God I never talked to anyone about all these things. Not even to my family. Sorry for crying like that."  
  
" Thanks that made me feel special and its okay. Carter if you ever need anyone to talk to I'll always be here. Not to tease but to listen."  
  
" Yeah. "  
  
" I should leave now it's getting late."  
  
" Yeah." She got up and gotten her things and I walked her to the door. Before she left she hugged me tightly.  
  
" If you ever need anything I'm here." She whispered.  
  
Just as she walked down the hallway to the elevator I yelled after her, " Rachel! Thanks for everything!"  
  
She turned to look at me with a sweet smile on her face, just as she stepped into the elevator, she pressed the button, and said, " Your welcome. Bye Carter."  
  
The door closed, her face disappeared. I then went back to my apartment, closed the door, and felt warmth and relief I had not felt in a long time. 


	3. Chapter 4 A new emotion

Chapter 4- A new emotion  
  
The next day I went to school a little early then I usually go. I just wanted to get there so I can catch Rachel, I heard she comes to school early. I wanted to talk to her some more; somehow it makes me feel good to have someone to talk to.  
  
In front of the building was a little coffee stand. Since I didn't see Rachel yet, I went over there and got some coffee. As I turned around I saw Rachel sitting on a bench reading, a couple feet away.  
  
I started towards her and as I got nearer I started to realize something. As the early morning sun shined on her, it hit me, she was very pretty. She was wearing a long brown skirt, a white blouse, and a long blue jean jacket. Her hair was half tied, legs crossed, and a total look of interest as she read.  
  
I was about 3 feet away when I said, "Hey, what you reading?"  
  
She looked up at me with a sweet smile, to me she looked. Beautiful. I wondered how come I never looked at her like that before. Then I mentally slapped myself, reminding me she's just a friend, and that she wasn't Jamie.  
  
"Hey! I'm reading To Kill A Mockingbird. Its okay, I always wanted to read it when I was little, but never got around to it. So. How you doing?" She said as I sat down next to her.  
  
" Great! I feel really good after yesterdays sob fest. I never felt this way in a long time. I feel as if something heavy was lifted off my chest. It's been long since I talked to anyone about Jamie's death. "  
  
" Its good to know that you're okay." She said with another smile on her face. Since we still had another half hour till class starts we started talking about things.  
  
We talked about how school was, our classes, and midterms. We also got around to talking more about Jamie. She just listens with total attention. It was like she was blocking out everything except my voice and me. I never talked to anyone like this, except for. Jamie.  
  
After I was done I looked at my watch and class was about to start in a couple of minutes.  
  
" We should go," I said.  
  
" Okay, but I'll race you."  
  
" What? Don't you think we're a little to old for that?"  
  
" Come on. What? You're afraid I might beat you?" She asked with a teasing look.  
  
" Yeah, right like you can ever beat me. I bet you I'll win."  
  
" Alright, loser has to buy winner dinner. Deal?"  
  
" Your on!"  
  
" On your mark. Ready. Set." She ran ahead of me before she even said go.  
  
" No fair you cheated," I yelled as I ran behind her.  
  
" Come on! Run those little legs of yours!" She yelled back at me. As I ran, I had another feeling. It was a feeling I had not had since Jamie died. It was a feeling of. Love. I couldn't believe it. I was falling for my enemy. Now the only question is am I ready? 


	4. Chapter 5 The Kiss

Chapter 5- The Kiss  
  
She won the race, so I had to buy her dinner that night. We went to a fast food place. She said she didn't want to go anywhere fancy and just wanted to relax.  
  
As we ate, I was trying to ignore the feeling I had earlier. Rachel must have notice, because she asked, " Landon are you okay?"  
  
" Yeah I am, its nothing." She decided not to pressure me into telling her. I was very grateful for that. We just talked again about stupid stuff. What I was like in high school, and what kind of friends I had.  
  
" Rach, since your parents are both gone what do you do for money?"  
  
" My uncle died a couple of years ago. He had a huge business but no kids. So when he died he left everything to me. I guess it was because I was his only sibling and he treated me like a daughter. I loved him, I still can't believe he died."  
  
I was sorry for bringing the question up because she had a sad look on her face, so II started to change the subject. After we were done eating, we went to my place and studied for a while. I was starting to understand more and more thanks to Rachel. I had a great time with her, I was sad when I had to take her home. As I walked her to her apartment door I started to feel awkward.  
  
" Thanks again for tutoring me." I said trying to break the silence.  
  
" It was nothing." She said quietly, I guess she must have felt the awkwardness.  
  
We just stood in silence for a minute in front of her door. Before I knew what was happening to me, I leaned down and kissed her. It lasted for a while and then we broke apart.  
  
All of a sudden Jamie flashed into my mind. I looked at Rachel and all I can do was say, " I, I, -I can't do this." And then I just ran away from her, not knowing if I left her hurt or speechless. Maybe a little of both. 


	5. Chapter 6 The Dream

Chapter 6- The Dream  
  
That night I went to my apartment and went to bed. I didn't bother to change; I just kicked off my shoes and jumped right into bed. I forced myself not to think about Rachel or the kiss. I made myself to just think of nothing.  
  
All of a sudden I found myself in a hospital hallway. There was a door on my right and left sight. A nurse with a bun came up to me and said, " Doctor, you have to choose. Who are you going to save? Jamie or Rachel?"  
  
" What are you talking about? Jamie's dead."  
  
" No she isn't she in the room on your right. You can still save her. But Rachel can die any minute. So who will it be? Who will you save?"  
  
I just looked at the women's face. And then I heard Jamie's voice calling to me.  
  
" Help me Landon."  
  
And then Rachel voice came out of nowhere saying, " Save me Landon."  
  
I didn't know whom to choose. Jamie or Rachel. I love them both; I don't know how to choose.  
  
The nurse kept on saying who would it be? I kept on hearing Rachel and Jamie's cries. I put both my hands on my head ad just kept on saying, " I don't know. I don't know."  
  
My alarm clock woke me up. I found myself sweating, little drops of water were on my forehead and nose. And in my mind was one question. Who will I choose? 


	6. Chapter 7 The Talk

Chapter 7- The Talk  
  
During the last couple of days, I did my best to ignore Rachel. I came to class a minute before the bell rang, so she couldn't walk up to me. After class I rushed a way hiding anywhere I can think of. I just didn't want to talk to her, I needed to get my head straighten out.  
  
A week later midterms came, and thanks to the tutoring, I actually understood everything. Since the weekend was coming up, I decided to visit my mom and dad, Jamie's dad, and Jamie.  
  
I decided to go to Jamie's grave first. Just to have a little chat with her. As I approach her grave, I saw a bouquet of roses. I thought maybe Jamie's dad probably put it there. I went up to her grave and picked the roses up. And then I heard footsteps behind me. I turned round and there I was facing Rachel.  
  
" I bought those for her. I didn't know what her favourite flowers were so I just got those." She said to me.  
  
" Oh.Um. Thanks. I bet she really loves it. Why. Why are you here?" I asked her not looking at her face.  
  
" Well, I remembered the things you told me about her. The place she was buried. So I thought I payed her a visit. And since midterms were over I knew you would come her. I guess I was right." She started to walk a little up to me. And stop half way.  
  
I said nothing still looking at the floor.  
  
" God! Landon we need to talk. And I know you know that we do. Landon I really like you. I never met anyone like you, and I know I'm falling in love with you. Landon if you think I'm here to make you forget Jamie, think again. I know how much she means to you. If your afraid of losing a memory of her, then I'll be here telling you the things you told me about her." She still stood where she was and kept on talking.  
  
" I never want you to forget her. She's an amazing person and from what I heard of her I really like her. I know she wants you to move on and not be lonely, it will hurt her. But Landon if we are ever going to have a chance to be together, you have to know one thing. I may not want you to forget Jamie, but I don't want to be in her shadow. I don't want to be compared to another women. I don't think any girls want that. I don't think anyone wants to know the number one person they love, only loves them as a number two. I don't care if that makes me a horrible, selfish, person. But that's how I feel. Wouldn't you feel that way if Jamie loves you, but knowing she loves someone else more? "  
  
I knew the answer to that, and I would hate it.  
  
I finally took all of my courage and looked Rachel in the eyes, and I saw tears on her face. I still didn't say anything and I was still holding the roses in my hand.  
  
"I know I'm not perfect. I'm not a Christian; I don't do the nice things she did. Sometimes I wonder what I have to offer you. I mean Jamie gave you hope, faith, she made you believe in yourself. And then I realize there is one huge thing I can give you. I can share my life with you, I can be there for you, and most of all I love you. I don't want to be in Jamie's shadow. So what it's going to be? Are you going to move on?"  
  
I just looked at her confuse, sad, and hating myself for doing this to her. The things she said were true, no one can have relationship know the person they love, love someone else more then them. But I still didn't know what to say to her.  
  
" Rachel, I'm confuse. I don't know. If I can do this now." I said now looking at the floor.  
  
" Well, then Landon. I can't wait forever. So I guess this is it. I don't think we should see each other or be friends anymore. It's going to hurt me. I hope you have a good life Carter. I just hope one day you'll move on." She slowly walked a way from me and I watched her as she leave. Then halfway she turned to me and said, " She's proud of you Landon. She will always love you. I'm sure of that."  
  
Just like that she disappeared from my sight. I walked up to Jamie's tombstone and then I realized I was crying. I wish I knew what to do. I hate hurting Rachel like that. I hated myself for not knowing what to do.  
  
I put down the flowers and touch the tombstone. I silently whisper, " Jamie. What am I to do?" 


	7. Chapter 8 The dream same title

Chapter 8- The dream  
  
After a half hour I decided to go visit Jamie's father. On the way there I did all I could to try and not think about what happened. When I finally got to the old house where Jamie and I practiced lines, memories started flashing in my head. I was almost about to cry until the door opened.  
  
" Landon, its good to see you gain. Come in." It was the reverend; he still looked the same when I saw him before. He led me to the couch and sat across me. I saw Jamie and my wedding picture on the mantel, which again almost brought tears to my eyes.  
  
" So, Landon how's school?"  
  
" Its good. I was having problems but a friend helped me. What about you sir?" I said wanting to turn my thought a way from Rachel.  
  
" Great. But I'm getting older I can see it in my hair." He said with that nice warm smile.  
  
" Your not old sir."  
  
" Oh well, no matter how much you deny it I am Landon. Anyways how's it going Landon besides school?"  
  
I looked down deciding whether or not I should tell him about Rachel. I needed to talk to someone, I knew that. So I went out and told him everything. Before I knew it, it was dinnertime.  
  
Jamie's dad didn't say anything for a while. We sat in silence for a while at the dinner table. It was like he was in deep thought.  
  
Finally he said, " Landon I believe its time for you to move on. Jamie would want you to, your mother and I want you to. I learned to accept Jamie's death, but I don't believe you have. I know you must feel guilty, like your cheating on Jamie. Yet, I know Jamie wants you to go for it. It seems to me that this Rachel girl changed you like Jamie did. Still what Rachel said to you is true. A relationship must be equal. It wouldn't be fair to her if your heart doesn't rightfully belong to her. Its time to let go of Jamie and to move on.  
  
Like that he turned the conversation to a different subject. I decided to stay the night in Jamie's room. I took a little time replaying the memories of Jamie. I knew what the reverend said was right, but I don't know if I can let go.  
  
I went out to the balcony where Jamie and I danced. I sat down and looked at the stars.  
  
" You know Landon, what my father said was right. You have to move on."  
  
I looked at my right and there sitting next to me was Jamie. She was in the gown she wore for the play and she was glowing.  
  
" I must be dreaming," I said in bewilderment.  
  
" Maybe you are maybe your not. But either way we need to talk. Landon, go to Rachel she's good for you. Learn to let me go once and for all. But once you do love her the same as you love me."  
  
" But-"  
  
" Landon our love can never be replaced. Our love it's so different and wonderful. No one can have what we have. But it hurts me to see you blocking yourself from someone you love. I know you'll never stop loving me and never forget me. But its time to move on." She said all that in a soft and gentle voice with a smile.  
  
" And you know, Rachel's right. I am so proud of you with all my heart. And I will never stop loving you."  
  
I then realize I was crying. I then said slowly, "I miss you so much. I'm afraid I might lose or forget how you look."  
  
" Landon that can never happen. I know you; you'll fight to keep these memories. You have pictures too, nothing can erase our memories together." She leaned forward and wiped a way one of my tears. She then kissed me on the cheek and then the lips.  
  
" I have to go now."  
  
  
  
" Wait, before you do what about one last dance?" I said standing up.  
  
" Okay, just one dance", she said with a smile.  
  
She got up and we both dance. She started to sing the song she sang at the play. I closed my eyes and let it all sink in. Once Jamie sang the last note she whispered in my ear, " Goodbye Landon. I'll always love you."  
  
I felt wind passing by me. I then opened my eyes and she was gone. I stepped back in the room and got changed and went under the covers and slept. I dreamn't the same dream. The one with the nurses pushing me to answer who will I save, Rachel or Jamie. But this time I wasn't confuse, I knew whom to save.  
  
  
  
I turned to the doctor on my right, " You I want you to bring Jamie into Rachel's room. Now! Now!"  
  
The doctor pushed Jamie out of her room and into Rachel's room. They were by each other side saying, ' Help me Landon.'  
  
I grabbed both of their hands and said, " I love you to both, and nothing is going to happen. I'm not losing both of you. I love you two in the same yet different way."  
  
Jamie smiled and looked me in the eyes and said, " Well then."  
  
Then Rachel said with a small smile, " You found the answer to your problems." 


	8. Chapter 9 The Cold Shoulder

Chapter 9- The Cold Shoulder  
  
I spent the weekend visiting my mom and dad. I went to church, it seemed like ages ago since I been to one. I met up with some old friends and I spend a lot of time thinking of a way to make up to Rachel. I hated myself for doing that to her. I finally let myself think about the kiss. It was a great kiss, soft and wonderful.  
  
I was saying good- bye to everyone the night I was leaving. Jamie's hugged me and whisper in my ear, " Don't let her get away. She's good for u."  
  
I drove back to my apartment when it was 12:00 midnight. I thought it was late to call Rachel, so I thought I could talk to her at school tomorrow. I went to bed without taking my clothes off and fell to a nice sleep. I woke up as the alarm clock was ringing its head off. I was wide-awake and happy. I jumped off my bed and rushed to the bathroom and took a quick shower. I was very surprised when I found myself humming, which I haven't done in a long time.  
  
I had a quick breakfast and rushed off to school early. I knew Rachel was at the bench reading a book. When I got there sure enough there she was reading a book. I came up to her slowly and said, " Hey, what you reading?"  
  
She turned her head to me and gasped, " Landon!"  
  
" That's my name, " I said with a goofy smile one my face. It felt like high school. She hurry and stood up from the bench the book still in her hand.  
  
" What are you doing here? I thought we agreed not to see-"  
  
I cut her off by rushing up and kissed her. It was a great kiss better then last time, she dropped her book and put her arms around me. It lasted about a minute until she realized what was happening.  
  
" What are you doing?" She said as she pushed me backward.  
  
" The day you told me off was the day I thought things through. The things you said to me were true, I have to move on. With advice from a good friend and someone special I realized I was an idiot. I want to move on, I want to move on with you." I stepped up to her again and kissed her. But then she backed away and looked at me.  
  
" How do I know all this is true? How do I know you are ready to move on?"  
  
" I-"  
  
" You hurted me so much at the cemetery that day. You really loved Jamie and I don't know if it's true that you're ready for this. How do I know? I don't want to get hurt and it seems like I will if I be with you." There were tears in her eyes.  
  
" I'm sorry Landon. I- we can't do this." Like that she picked up her things and walked way from me.  
  
The next couple of days, no matter how much I tried to talk to Rachel, she ignored me. I did everything I could but nothing helped. Then one day I saw he kissed another guy at school. I just thought to myself, ' is it really over? Have I really lost her? Nice work Landon, you really done it this time.'  
  
  
  
Authors note- Hey guys! Thanks for the review it really made me happy. You guys made my day! You can talk to me if you want to talk. Anyways-just want to tell you in 2 chapters this story will be ending. Bye! 


	9. Chapter 10 The Right Medicine

Chapter 10- The right medicine  
  
I was so confused on what to do, so I stayed a way from Rachel just like she wanted. The week passed by and I caught a cold. I knew I was missing so much work from school, but no matter how much I tried to get out the door, I always fall back on my bed.  
  
A day later the doorbell rang and I used all my strength to get the door. I was surprised to see Rachel there.  
  
" Landon!" She said with her eyes popping out. " You look worse then I imagined."  
  
" Gee, that's a great way to perk someone up. I feel so much better." I said with a fake smile.  
  
" Sorry! I guess you must be wondering why I'm here."  
  
" Yeah, that sort of crossed my mind since you ignored me for a couple of weeks now. I thought you wanted to be away from me. Now here you are."  
  
" I'm here to bring you your homework. The professors said you should rest and then worry about your homework once your feeling better."  
  
" They choose you to give it to me?"  
  
" Well, not exactly. I volunteered myself; I wanted to make sure your okay. Its obvious your not. You need to rest, Landon. You should have gotten someone to take care of you." She said with a worried expression. " Lucky for you I am prepared."  
  
She held up a plastic back and took my arm and led me back into the apartment. She started to take things out of the bag. There were tissues, soup, food, and thermometer, basically all your basic needs for a cold or fever.  
  
" Wow, didn't know you cared that much." I said raising my eyebrow up. But deep down I was touched and happy that she still cared.  
  
" Landon I may have said I didn't want to be with you or get too close. But that didn't mean I stopped caring." She said with a sad look in her eyes.  
  
" What about your boyfriend?"  
  
" Who? Oh Tim, that's nothing. I thought I really liked him, but realized I was just using him to get over something." She said with her head down and I knew it was me.  
  
Day by day Rachel kept coming over and took care of me. We were starting to be friends again. Even if I couldn't have her as a girlfriend, at least I could have her as a friend.  
  
A week later my cold was gone and when Rachel came I answered the door full with energy.  
  
" Well, I see your feeling better." She said with her pretty smile.  
  
" Yep, all thanks to the perfect nurse. Come on in."  
  
She went in and we had an awkward silence. Apparently things were starting to get back to the thing again. But all of a sudden before I knew it she rushed up to me and kissed me.  
  
When the wonderful kiss was done I looked at her surprised. "What happen?"  
  
" I wanted to do this ever since I saw you when you had a cold. But I didn't want to kiss someone with a stuffy nose." She said with a smile and hugged me tightly.  
  
I hugged her back and asked, " Why the change of heart?"  
  
" Yesterday at night in bed I was going crazy thinking what I should do. I wanted to be with you but I was so unsure. I fell asleep and had a dream. I was dieing and so was Jamie, she looked like the way I saw her in the picture. Only her hair was messier and she was in the same room with me. You were there and you said you'd save us both. And it didn't matter you had two people in your heart. Either way you love us in the same and very different way. I woke up and I had this feeling that the dream was telling the truth. You have moved on." She looked in my eyes deeply. " I had a feeling that everything was alright and I can finally be with you."  
  
" Your dream was telling the truth. I had the same dream too." I said with a smile.  
  
" What?" she asked with a confused look.  
  
" I'll tell you later, but for now I like to kiss you." And like that we kissed for a long time and it felt wonderful and perfect in every way. 


	10. Chapter 11 The proposal

Chapter 11- The Proposal  
  
Rachel and I spent our years in medical school together. During our breaks I took her to my hometown and let her meet the reverend and my parents. My parents seem to like her and were happy I finally moved on. The reverend were interested in her point of view in God. Some things Rachel believed in, the reverend didn't believed, and the same with Rachel but they didn't argue or try to change it. The reverend was just like my parents, happy.  
  
On our graduation from medical school I took Rachel to the beach and had a little picnic. It was night and no one was there, we enjoyed the silence and the moonlight.  
  
" Rachel?"  
  
" Yeah?"  
  
" Close your eyes." She did without asking any questions. I slowly lifted her left hand and slipped on a ring.  
  
" Open you eyes" She looked at her left hand and saw the gold ring with a little diamond on the middle.  
  
She gasps, " Landon! Its beautiful, but isn't this a.?" She lifted up an eyebrow and I gently laughed.  
  
" Rachel," I said as I made her stand up. I bended down on one knee and asked, " You helped me through everything. I can't thank you enough. You loved me and were always there. Will you marry me?"  
  
There were tears in her eyes and she bended down until we were head to head. " Yes. I will."  
  
She kissed me through her tears. I felt as if my world was almost complete. Just almost.  
  
  
  
Author note: Hey guys! I know some of you must hate me that Landon has someone else. Its just when I watch a walk to remember, I just don't want him to be alone or anything, it broke my heart. So in my mind, knowing he has someone else makes me happy. I want to know what you guys think of Jamie! Thanks, this will be ending in 2 more chapters. This time I am sure of it. 


	11. Chapter 12 The Wedding

Chapter 12- The Wedding  
  
A/N: Sorry I meant to say what you guys think of Rachel. Typo.  
  
A month later we were married. Rachel knew how much the old wedding ring was to me, so she decided to put the new ring on top of it, that way I never would have to take off the ring that was important to me.  
  
We had the wedding at the church Jamie and I were wedded. We thought that way, Jamie could be there. We had Reverend Sullivan perform the ceremony, and we had friends and family attend.  
  
The wedding was on a chilly day. All windows were close and inside was nice and warm. My dad was once again my best man and Rachel best friend Claire was the bridesmaid. As soon as the guests all arrived the wedding started.  
  
The big door in the back was slowly opened and stepped out Rachel. She was wearing a simple long sleeve gown. She had on a see through veil and was smiling brightly as she walked down the aisle. No one was beside her to give her a way but that didn't matter. While she was facing me all I could think was that she was so beautiful. Everything else just disappears from my mind and only her was in my thoughts.  
  
" We're gathering here today to celebrate a joyous occasion." He started to read the passage that was read at Jamie and mine wedding before. After that we went on to the I do's. It was time to put the rings on but Rachel then said, " Before we go on there's something I like to do."  
  
I look at the Reverend, thinking he knew what it was. But the look on his face I knew he didn't have a clue.  
  
" I think it would be special if we can really make it feel like Jamie is really here." Rachel smiled and turned to Claire who nodded and went out the door in the back. A couple of minutes later a TV was wheeled in to the front of the alter.  
  
" After a lot of tracking down, I was able to find the video tape of when Jamie sang at the play. I like us to take a little time to pray to Jamie or at least think about her as we watch this tape. Lets just say this is a gift to both Landon and Reverend Sullivan." Rachel smiled and put a tape in the vcr.  
  
An image popped up the screen and there was Jamie in her beautiful blue dress. She started to sing, her beautiful voice drowning the room. I just stared at the screen and back at Rachel. In the back of my mind I always wanted Jamie to at least be there at my wedding. I wanted her to know she will always be a part of my life.  
  
Seeing the TV up in front me, it felt as if I proved to her that. And it wasn't even me doing this it was Rachel. I thanked her with my eyes and I knew if anyone did this was the person who understands me. And that was Rachel.  
  
As the video came to an end, I turned to look at the Reverend and saw there were tears in his eyes. I never knew why, maybe it was because the death of his daughter reminded him of the pain again. But I looked up in his eyes and it wasn't filled with sadness, instead happiness and thankfulness. Perhaps it was because he always wanted to hear her voice for one last time. He wasn't able to track down the video after Jamie's death, but now here it was in front of him. Maybe it was also he was happy Rachel knew how Jamie was to him. And to do this sweet thing, proved a lot.  
  
The Reverend looked at Rachel and whispered, " Thank you."  
  
The ceremony began again and you could tell some of the guests were crying. We put on the rings; like it was planned the ring was put on top of the other ring on my finger. We then ended it with a kiss.  
  
All of a sudden a wind push one of the windows open and softly came into the room. As it passed Rachel and I, I heard a graceful voice in a soft whisper, " I will always love you. And I celebrate you."  
  
I looked at Rachel and the Reverend. The look on the faces told me they heard it too. I looked at my dad and Claire and the guests, it seem they didn't hear it. I turn my gaze back at Rachel and she and I smiled. We both turn our heads at the Reverend who also smiled. Somehow Jamie was there, and it was a special gift to have her here. And what a wonderful gift it was. 


	12. Chapter 13 The Perfect Ending To the Per...

Chapter 13- The Perfect Ending to The Perfect Life  
  
Its now been 6 years since Rachel and I got married. We were now in our 30's and we have the most beautiful kids. Our son, Timothy, is 5 and he is the bravest in the family. Lily, our 3 year old, is the sweetest and beautiful. And our last but not least child was little Jamie. She was only 6 month old and is as quiet as anyone baby can be.  
  
You may think its weird to name my first love to one of my children. But it isn't, in fact I want them to know, when their older, that there was another Jamie and how she taught me faith and love.  
  
After graduation, Rachel and I work together in a hospital not that far from my hometown. But after Rachel found out she was pregnant with Timothy she stopped. She became a housewife and what a great one she became. I work to support our family but I always had time for my family.  
  
I take the kids to church when I can, with Rachel; sometimes we go to the one near our home. But other times we go to see Reverend Sullivan who is still standing strong. Rachel teaches her thoughts on religion to the kids and I teach mine. We're not bother at all about that, we respect and even learn more about each other religions. We do teach two same things to our kids though, faith and love, something that took me a long time to learn.  
  
We started a program a year after we had Timothy. It was where people, a child or adult, who has cancer make wish list. They list the things they want to do before they die and we try to help them with it. Rachel and I thought of this when it was the anniversary death of Jamie. Rachel also had the idea of naming another star after Jamie, we named it Angel Jamie. So when someone is losing faith they just look up and find the star and just once again remember to have faith. It would seem as if Jamie was watching down of you helping you through the hard times.  
  
Some of you might think I married Rachel to forget about Jamie. Or some might think Rachel resembles Jamie and I married her cause I see Jamie in her. These facts are wrong, I married Rachel for her. For who she is and for her alone. I love Jamie with all my heart and more and I still do. I also love Rachel with all my heart and will always love her. I love them in both the same and yet very very different ways.  
  
If Jamie never died and Rachel came into my life, is something hard to think about. I don't know if I could choose and I know this thought will cross your mind. I know that Jamie died for a reason and it was in God's plan. Wherever Jamie is, in heaven or another life, I know she's happy and safe. How? I don't know, I have a feeling, a strong one.  
  
" Landon? Hey its almost midnight shouldn't you be asleep, you have a big day tomorrow." Rachel came out onto the balcony in her pyjamas and came to sit of the arm of the chair I was sitting on.  
  
" I'm writing my book. It's almost done; I just have to write a sentence or two." I said with a smile looking into her eyes.  
  
" Okay, I'll wait up with you. I'm not tired anyways."  
  
" No, I want you to go to sleep. You had a hard day with the kids."  
  
" Fine dad. I'll go to bed, but I won't sleep until you come in. See how I compromise?" She said with a mischievous smile on her face.  
  
" Your very clever. Now go." I ordered pointing to the door.  
  
" Fine, fine, fine. Good night." She gave me a kiss and was walking towards the door.  
  
" Rachel?" I said, stopping her halfway.  
  
" Yeah?"  
  
" Your beautiful as always."  
  
" Thank you." She said with a confuse look. She then turn back around and walk up to me and said, " I love you."  
  
" I love you too." I said looking into her eyes deeply. After a minute kiss she left me alone with the dark night with only the full moon to be my light.  
  
I returned to my book and started to end it:  
  
Jamie can never be replace, like Rachel can't be replace. I hope now she's proud of me. I have a perfect life and even though I'm not dead, I know I will have a perfect ending to this perfect life.  
  
After I wrote that, I realize the book I worked on after Jamie's death was finally done. I ended it with an ending I know would come true.  
  
I stood up and walked over to the edge of the balcony. I looked up into the stars and found the Angel Jamie star. I didn't know if it was my imagination but as the wind brushed past me, I heard, " I'll always be proud of you."  
  
I then look up at the sky where the star was located. I saw it blink like an eye winking. I smiled and then walked back in the house. Before I walked in I turn around and I looked at my wedding finger which hold two rings, ones I never took off. With a smile I whispered, " Thank you for everything Jamie, I'll always love you."  
  
I then turn back around and went into the house and into my room. I knew Rachel wasn't asleep yet so I went under the covers and turned to her. I kissed her head and hugged her and she hugged me back. I closed my eyes and slept with Rachel and Jamie in my heart forever.  
  
The End. 


End file.
